(00:00:00):
Okay, there it is.
(00:00:02):
Got it.
(00:00:03):
Okay.
(00:00:04):
Okay, hopefully it doesn't shut us down at 40 minutes, but maybe that's a good thing.
(00:00:08):
People will be like, oh my god.
(00:00:13):
Why?
(00:00:14):
Why are you doing this to us?
(00:00:16):
I mean,
(00:00:19):
to be fair,
(00:00:20):
Joe Rogan has podcasts that are like two hours long,
(00:00:25):
which is just mind-boggling to me.
(00:00:28):
Like, yeah, I could have
(00:00:29):
like conversations that long but it's just like it's really hard to listen to I
(00:00:33):
feel like I know I mean like I can do a movie but it has to be like hella like in
(00:00:40):
that mindset to listen and sit for two hours exactly because like I I listen to his
(00:00:47):
shit when I'm like meaning like literally like
(00:00:51):
my version of mind-numbing TV almost to like none of the controversial ones like I
(00:00:57):
listened to him and Roseanne Barr which she's freaking crazy by the way like whoa
(00:01:06):
but anyway okay back on on on the train track welcome
(00:01:13):
to the Curiosity Chronicles.
(00:01:16):
I am your host, Taylor Cecilia Brooke, and with me I have the most wonderful Megan Lee.
(00:01:22):
That's like what you're you're gonna go by, right?
(00:01:25):
Just like Megan Lee.
(00:01:27):
Okay, awesome.
(00:01:28):
And we're just gonna have a
(00:01:33):
casual discussion and really, really live up to the name of the Curiosity Chronicles.
(00:01:38):
So I was thinking that it would be a good idea if you introduced yourself and just
(00:01:45):
told everyone a little bit about yourself and like anything you think that's relevant.
(00:01:52):
Okay.
(00:01:53):
Let's see.
(00:01:54):
This is the question that fucks me up the most when you're like, tell me about yourself.
(00:01:57):
And I'm like, oh my God.
(00:01:59):
I don't know how to do that.
(00:02:01):
I literally have amnesia from all of my years on this planet.
(00:02:09):
I'm like, I'm the most boring person.
(00:02:12):
Um, yes.
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Um, let's see.
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So I, I live in the Midwest.
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I live in a boring,
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uh,
(00:02:17):
flyover state,
(00:02:18):
although I've,
(00:02:19):
I've decided that I don't live in the most boring flyover state.
(00:02:21):
So I have like that determination.
(00:02:24):
Oh yeah.
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I probably live in the, I don't know.
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I lived in Kansas.
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That's a toss up.
(00:02:31):
Like, okay.
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I'm in Oklahoma right now.
(00:02:34):
And it's like, I don't know which one's more boring.
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Dee's from Nebraska.
(00:02:39):
So it's like.
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So I'm in Wisconsin.
(00:02:44):
I'm like, everyone is like the cheesehead state.
(00:02:48):
So that's actually that's so funny.
(00:02:51):
Dee's up there right now for work training.
(00:02:53):
And we were looking at vacationing in Wisconsin Dells.
(00:02:57):
Oh, I'm actually going there with my daughter next month because it's a blast.
(00:03:02):
They've got like some killer deals on hotels,
(00:03:06):
like cheap hotels that have,
(00:03:08):
you get like a room for four nights,
(00:03:11):
you get four passes to their water,
(00:03:14):
to the big fancy water park,
(00:03:17):
four passes to something else,
(00:03:18):
and then like the hotel itself has like two pools or something,
(00:03:23):
like one indoor,
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one outdoor,
(00:03:24):
and they have like epic slides.
(00:03:26):
I'm just like,
(00:03:26):
What the fuck?
(00:03:27):
Why isn't everywhere like this?
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Hey, you know what?
(00:03:31):
I can probably rep my state on that front.
(00:03:33):
And it's actually really a great destination for kids.
(00:03:38):
Yeah, so it's definitely one we're going to keep on our list.
(00:03:42):
But anyway, okay, so you're in the Midwest.
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Yes.
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Lovely Midwest.
(00:03:47):
Glad we got that shame out of the way.
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I have an eight-year-old daughter, single mom.
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Been that way for most of the time.
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I was married a long time ago.
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Got married.
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married very young and mistakes were made, lessons were learned.
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But you know, I also, I love lessons that I've learned and I'm sure you can relate.
(00:04:14):
You wouldn't be where you are today if you hadn't gone down those paths.
(00:04:17):
So here we are.
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And oh my God, it's like before divorce, after divorce, before that, after that.
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Yeah.
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Yeah, I have all of those.
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Yes.
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Yes.
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And it's like,
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there was that turning point for me where I was like,
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okay,
(00:04:33):
I now have to figure out a lot of shit on my own.
(00:04:36):
And it's kind of, I feel like that was like about six years ago now.
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And it's kind of just been on this like path of being like, all right, who am I?
(00:04:45):
What do I want to do with my life?
(00:04:47):
How do I make a life that I actually love and want?
(00:04:50):
And that just kind of has been the journey that I've been on the last several years.
(00:04:55):
until present day I I feel all of that so much and like completely relate so who do
(00:05:04):
you feel like you're stepping into like being are you do you feel like you're
(00:05:09):
getting closer to who you think like your your highest self is or where do you
(00:05:14):
think you are in that process
(00:05:16):
Oh, Jesus.
(00:05:17):
I feel like some days I'm really feeling good about myself.
(00:05:21):
And I'm like, yes, this is what life is about.
(00:05:24):
This is amazing.
(00:05:25):
Like I'm journaling and like faith, manifestation, quantum physics.
(00:05:29):
And then the next day I'm like in this hole of shit.
(00:05:31):
And I'm like, what hole did I crawl into?
(00:05:35):
And how do I get out?
(00:05:37):
I literally, like, two days ago, it was like, yes, all these affirmations.
(00:05:42):
I was feeling them.
(00:05:43):
I was feeling everything.
(00:05:45):
And then, like, earlier today, I was fucking bawling in the garage while smoking.
(00:05:49):
Why?
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Oh, my God.
(00:05:54):
I do feel like it's,
(00:05:57):
if I look at myself on a map,
(00:05:58):
I'm like,
(00:05:58):
okay,
(00:05:59):
I have definitely grown in the last,
(00:06:03):
you know,
(00:06:03):
six years.
(00:06:05):
And with growth comes more awareness and more awareness makes you be like,
(00:06:09):
holy shit,
(00:06:10):
I have so much more to learn.
(00:06:11):
It's like a double edged sword.
(00:06:13):
It really is.
(00:06:15):
For sure.
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Yeah, I totally I totally get that.
(00:06:19):
And I feel that because it's just like.
(00:06:24):
It's hard not to compare because they're not kidding when they say comparison is
(00:06:29):
the thief of joy,
(00:06:30):
you know,
(00:06:31):
so it's like you're trying to not compare,
(00:06:34):
but you're
(00:06:36):
that bitch is like, you need to go, you need to go look like you need, you need to compare yourself.
(00:06:42):
Damn it.
(00:06:44):
Oh my God.
(00:06:45):
That's, that's one of the things that fucks me up the most in my life.
(00:06:49):
I really believe it's comparing, comparing myself.
(00:06:51):
That is something that like ruminates in my mind.
(00:06:53):
I'm like,
(00:06:54):
if I could just fix the comparisonitis,
(00:06:57):
like disease that I have permeating my body,
(00:07:00):
my life would be perfect.
(00:07:01):
I wouldn't care.
(00:07:02):
There'd be no yardstick.
(00:07:04):
I would have this elusive inner peace that I think is like the highest standard and
(00:07:08):
that everything would fall into place.
(00:07:10):
And I'm like, why is it so goddamn hard for me to not, like, why can't I just mind my own business?
(00:07:16):
Why am I like looking around what everyone else is doing?
(00:07:18):
Fucking for real.
(00:07:20):
Like, I will say that I feel like I found that it was
(00:07:26):
It's a lot easier to not do it as much.
(00:07:29):
Like the bursts of that comparison are less than they were when I was like really
(00:07:36):
heavy on Instagram and Facebook and Pinterest.
(00:07:39):
I don't know if you feel the same way,
(00:07:41):
but like with Substack,
(00:07:42):
it feels like there are days where I'm like,
(00:07:44):
oh my God,
(00:07:45):
I want to be her.
(00:07:46):
But that's about as far as it goes.
(00:07:49):
Yeah.
(00:07:50):
It's not as much as like,
(00:07:51):
oh my god,
(00:07:52):
they have this many subscribers and they're doing this and they're doing that.
(00:07:56):
So...
(00:07:58):
I feel that I actually got off of Instagram.
(00:08:02):
I mean, that was, and TikTok, like the main ones, like two years ago now.
(00:08:07):
And because it was,
(00:08:08):
it was getting to this point where I like the likes and you know,
(00:08:12):
who is responding to my stuff and who is engaging.
(00:08:15):
And it was just such a energy suck of mine.
(00:08:18):
And I had so much, I like got so much validation out of it.
(00:08:22):
And it was so amazing.
(00:08:23):
Wrong.
(00:08:23):
It was so shallow.
(00:08:24):
It was so empty.
(00:08:26):
And so I was like, I can't, I can't do that anymore.
(00:08:28):
And I agree.
(00:08:29):
Substack feels very different because it's, it's not as like external focused.
(00:08:34):
It's a lot more like reflection and people sharing their thoughts and it feels a lot more genuine.
(00:08:38):
And, and I still, it's not necessarily Substack that I compare myself to.
(00:08:43):
I just...
(00:08:44):
I don't know.
(00:08:45):
I have these chips on my shoulder that are my own chips on my shoulders,
(00:08:48):
but like for certain things,
(00:08:49):
like with my career or like life goals,
(00:08:53):
it's like,
(00:08:53):
oh,
(00:08:54):
how are these people doing it?
(00:08:55):
And I'm not.
(00:08:55):
Yeah.
(00:08:56):
Yeah.
(00:08:57):
I'm like, yeah, no, I do get that.
(00:09:00):
I get that for sure.
(00:09:05):
So if you can, like, tell us a little bit about like,
(00:09:15):
what your day job kind of looks like with like what you do without like revealing
(00:09:20):
anything that you don't want to reveal,
(00:09:21):
obviously.
(00:09:23):
Yes.
(00:09:24):
So I'm in the marketing space.
(00:09:27):
I work at a,
(00:09:29):
It's a interesting intersection because it's in the,
(00:09:33):
I'm doing air quotes,
(00:09:34):
public affairs space,
(00:09:35):
because that is something like three years ago,
(00:09:38):
I'd have been like,
(00:09:38):
what the fuck is public affairs?
(00:09:40):
I would have been like, I'm going to pretend I know what it means, but I don't know what it means.
(00:09:45):
And so...
(00:09:46):
I quickly learned that it's not the same thing as politics and people will look at
(00:09:50):
you like you're sideways if you think that public affairs and politics are the same thing.
(00:09:55):
So it's, you know, we're helping nonprofits, we're working in that space.
(00:09:59):
And I also have realized that I
(00:10:02):
Again, I'm like, oh my God, my employer can never know that this exists.
(00:10:05):
But I just, I don't have any desire to be anywhere near the political adjacent space anymore at all.
(00:10:14):
Like I'm so, so done with it.
(00:10:17):
And that's not to say that there's not great people in there that,
(00:10:20):
that can exist,
(00:10:21):
but they're the exception.
(00:10:23):
And, and so it's just, I like marketing.
(00:10:27):
I like certain parts of marketing,
(00:10:28):
but why I got into marketing,
(00:10:30):
why I thought I wanted to get into like the political side of it no longer exists
(00:10:35):
in any way,
(00:10:35):
shape or form within me at all.
(00:10:37):
And so, um,
(00:10:39):
Even in the role that I do right now,
(00:10:40):
I kind of work as like a doing video producing role and working on the creative
(00:10:45):
team on creative projects.
(00:10:49):
The stuff that I really love doing,
(00:10:50):
to be honest,
(00:10:51):
just kind of gets like lost in what I get to in what I do.
(00:10:56):
And it's my like, yeah, it's just it's not it's not there.
(00:11:01):
So it's actually a really big pain point.
(00:11:02):
It's actually going to make it into my newsletter tomorrow that's coming out about the woes of my job.
(00:11:07):
So.
(00:11:08):
Ooh, I'm excited to read that.
(00:11:10):
I love your newsletters.
(00:11:13):
Thank you.
(00:11:13):
I got to say though,
(00:11:15):
like this,
(00:11:16):
it's funny that you brought that up because I,
(00:11:19):
my job has been very much a source of angst for me lately.
(00:11:23):
Yeah.
(00:11:25):
I feel that.
(00:11:26):
I actually have a post coming out about that.
(00:11:29):
On next Thursday.
(00:11:30):
I think.
(00:11:33):
Yes.
(00:11:35):
Yeah.
(00:11:36):
So yeah.
(00:11:38):
I do very much.
(00:11:41):
Understand that.
(00:11:43):
Like my current job right now.
(00:11:45):
Like I'm good at it.
(00:11:47):
And I don't.
(00:11:49):
Hate it.
(00:11:51):
But like.
(00:11:53):
It's just not like.
(00:11:57):
what I need anymore so yeah it's just like there's just other things that I feel
(00:12:03):
like it's like the universe is telling me it's time to like it's time to do some
(00:12:08):
other things now but like you're saying that shit like there when you have like
(00:12:14):
other people i.e.
(00:12:16):
little things relying on you like it's not as simple as just like oh let's just try this it's not no
(00:12:27):
It's like you feel, you're like, oh my God, I have a job.
(00:12:29):
I'm employed.
(00:12:30):
I'm getting paid every month.
(00:12:32):
And it's like to want more or want outside of that,
(00:12:36):
either you feel guilty,
(00:12:37):
you feel like you're going to rock the boat.
(00:12:39):
Like what if you crack something open that you can't recover from?
(00:12:42):
It's like, oh my God.
(00:12:44):
All of that, literally all of that.
(00:12:48):
It's so, and like, it doesn't matter how many fucking like,
(00:12:54):
empowerment books you fucking read like it just it's uh when you've been in that
(00:13:05):
position it's just so difficult to get out of i actually think the most recent book
(00:13:12):
that i just finished um was i think it's called we should all be millionaires or
(00:13:17):
something like that um
(00:13:20):
It's been my favorite money book so far because she was a single mom who grew up in
(00:13:25):
poverty and like was really broke.
(00:13:28):
She had like no money in college, had, you know, three, like so much debt, so much debt.
(00:13:34):
And I was like, oh, I can actually relate to all of this now.
(00:13:37):
Now I didn't grow up in like true poverty, but you know, wasn't like, we were like lower middle class.
(00:13:46):
And I, yeah.
(00:13:49):
Yeah.
(00:13:50):
Yeah, it's been a journey with my finances since then.
(00:13:55):
Oh, my God.
(00:13:55):
The money scarcity, the money fear.
(00:13:57):
That one's a hard one for me to work through.
(00:14:00):
There are some deep, deep-seated, I feel like generational shit that is hard to overcome.
(00:14:08):
Yeah, and it sucks because I agree.
(00:14:11):
There's some serious generational shit that I don't know what they are because –
(00:14:17):
they weren't mine and I have no access to those people, but like, they have to come from somewhere.
(00:14:23):
And like,
(00:14:24):
I see the patterns and I'm,
(00:14:26):
I was the one next in line for that when it's,
(00:14:28):
you know,
(00:14:29):
going through and I have no access to the person who started it.
(00:14:33):
But I'm assuming it has something to do with the Great Depression.
(00:14:36):
I mean, logically, that makes a lot of sense.
(00:14:41):
Yeah.
(00:14:42):
Yeah.
(00:14:43):
That's the only thing where I'm like, okay, maybe.
(00:14:46):
I'm like, you know what?
(00:14:47):
I can kind of give those ancestors a pass.
(00:14:50):
That would be some hard shit to go through.
(00:14:53):
Oh, for sure.
(00:14:55):
Like, I can't.
(00:14:59):
I can't even imagine,
(00:15:00):
like,
(00:15:00):
if you think about what happened during the French Revolution,
(00:15:04):
like,
(00:15:04):
that wasn't that much earlier.
(00:15:06):
And they were literally fucking burning money in barrels to warm up because that
(00:15:11):
was cheaper than,
(00:15:13):
like,
(00:15:14):
paying for stuff.
(00:15:15):
Because their, like, whatever their dollar was, I don't remember, had lost all its value.
(00:15:21):
And I just remember, like, the first time I learned that, my mind just, like, breaking.
(00:15:25):
Yeah.
(00:15:26):
what how could that how does that even happen I know that's insane that's insane
(00:15:35):
super insane okay now that we've gone off topic for the one trillionth time because
(00:15:42):
that's the theme in my life um what is like
(00:15:48):
Okay,
(00:15:49):
first,
(00:15:49):
tell us a little bit about your sub stack and like what your goals and dreams are
(00:15:56):
with them.
(00:15:58):
Yeah, so I've always loved writing.
(00:16:01):
That's like the one common thread that I can piece together through my life.
(00:16:05):
And I'm like, writing makes sense.
(00:16:07):
I feel alive.
(00:16:08):
I love it.
(00:16:09):
It brings me joy, all this kind of stuff.
(00:16:11):
And so I had started like...
(00:16:16):
marketing side hustle business like several years ago and I built up a little
(00:16:20):
newsletter and then I was like well I want to go into like politics and make the
(00:16:24):
world a better place so I just like shut that all down like ghosted for like four
(00:16:29):
years and so I
(00:16:32):
But hearing about Substack and I was like, you know what?
(00:16:34):
This sounds really cool.
(00:16:35):
I've been feeling this like urge,
(00:16:37):
you know,
(00:16:37):
inside of you where your soul is just like,
(00:16:39):
it needs to write.
(00:16:40):
It needs to be seen.
(00:16:41):
And I had just like, I was like really insecure about it.
(00:16:44):
I'm like, oh, but the stuff I want to write about, I'm like, I don't know, man.
(00:16:47):
How is this going to come across?
(00:16:48):
It's either going to be like people get it or they're like stone me, you know?
(00:16:54):
So I...
(00:16:58):
I don't know.
(00:16:58):
It was just,
(00:16:59):
it's that point where it's like,
(00:17:00):
okay,
(00:17:01):
either you're going to be miserable because you don't do it or you're just going to like,
(00:17:05):
go ahead and do it.
(00:17:05):
So I was like, all right, I'm going to create this sub stack and thank the Lord.
(00:17:10):
I was from the get-go.
(00:17:11):
I was myself.
(00:17:12):
I was like, I'm just going to put it out there.
(00:17:14):
And so I,
(00:17:16):
Um,
(00:17:16):
it's just,
(00:17:18):
it's,
(00:17:18):
I started it with a different name and now it's called Shane sandwich because I
(00:17:22):
realized a lot of the stuff that was coming out was I wanted to talk about just be authentic,
(00:17:27):
just share the shit that's inside of me.
(00:17:29):
It feels good.
(00:17:30):
I like doing it.
(00:17:30):
I want to connect with other people.
(00:17:32):
And so it's, it's just kind of, it's funny.
(00:17:35):
Number one, I want to make people laugh.
(00:17:36):
I love laughter.
(00:17:37):
I think it's very cathartic and very healing.
(00:17:40):
So it's, uh, sometimes it's just funny.
(00:17:44):
Sometimes it's,
(00:17:45):
talking about shame, like my own shame, my own journey to live my own best life.
(00:17:50):
And ultimately the goal with it is to inspire other people to live their best life
(00:17:55):
by living my own best life,
(00:17:56):
leading by example.
(00:17:58):
And I guess long-term goal, I would love to monetize it.
(00:18:02):
I would love to get paid for my writing.
(00:18:04):
That
(00:18:07):
Now, the fucked up, like, oh, my God, well, how are you going to do this?
(00:18:10):
How are you going to do that?
(00:18:11):
How in the world can you make that happen?
(00:18:13):
Going on inside my brain right now is a whole other conversation.
(00:18:17):
But when I can silence those bitches, that would be amazing.
(00:18:21):
I want to write books, memoirs.
(00:18:25):
like coffee table swearing books, like all, all the above.
(00:18:28):
So I love that idea.
(00:18:31):
Oh my God.
(00:18:33):
That'd be so fucking fun.
(00:18:35):
That is a book I would actually put on a coffee table if I had a coffee table,
(00:18:38):
but I would put it on my bookcase for sure.
(00:18:41):
Like as a display book, like it would be so fun.
(00:18:45):
Oh my God.
(00:18:45):
I love that idea.
(00:18:47):
Did you see that?
(00:18:51):
I'm blanking on her name.
(00:18:54):
Maggie.
(00:18:57):
The other one who swears a lot?
(00:18:58):
Oh, Maggie John, yes.
(00:19:00):
Yes, yes, okay.
(00:19:04):
Did you see my comment?
(00:19:06):
She said something about, oh yeah, the holy swearity.
(00:19:11):
No, I don't think I saw that.
(00:19:12):
Was that from earlier today?
(00:19:13):
Yeah.
(00:19:13):
Yeah.
(00:19:13):
They called, she's like, we could be the holy swearity.
(00:19:16):
And I was like, that'd be a good podcast name.
(00:19:19):
That is hilarious.
(00:19:21):
That is a good podcast name.
(00:19:23):
Oh my God.
(00:19:24):
I love it.
(00:19:25):
Yeah.
(00:19:25):
You posted somewhere.
(00:19:27):
It was in one of your newsletters where you wanted like, you're like, can we just have like,
(00:19:33):
a group like where we say fuck it yeah the fucking mastermind yeah and we pay to be
(00:19:40):
like there like it's like monthly we hold each other accountable did you see how
(00:19:44):
many people were like yes I'm in uh I don't know maybe there's been more people
(00:19:50):
that I haven't seen after the fact there was probably like I think like five people
(00:19:54):
were like yeah let's do this like I'm in I would love this I'm just like this is
(00:19:59):
great oh my god
(00:20:03):
So I have had that dream of doing the Fuck It Mastermind.
(00:20:06):
I was actually in this mastermind like several years ago and I loved it.
(00:20:13):
It was like such a cool experience.
(00:20:15):
Like I realized I love like the community of like accountability,
(00:20:19):
number one,
(00:20:19):
because otherwise I will like fuck myself over.
(00:20:22):
Yeah.
(00:20:22):
yep big time yes I'm so good at procrastination good so god so I was like oh my god
(00:20:29):
this mastermind it feels so cool you can like bounce ideas out of people you can
(00:20:33):
talk to people that get it or in the trenches and I was like I want to do that and
(00:20:37):
then I was like oh but it like it has to be like the fucking mastermind like fuck
(00:20:41):
it live your best life you know so this has been like a dream for like years all
(00:20:45):
that to say so that would be amazing okay so if it's a dream how do we fucking make
(00:20:50):
this happen then because like
(00:20:53):
there's clearly interest and i'm like all for all that kind of shit and i'm like
(00:20:58):
the ultimate hype girl which is where lucy my youngest gets that from like if you
(00:21:03):
need a fucking cheerleader in her in your life she is your girl she can cheer you
(00:21:08):
on even when you're losing like she's just the sweetest oh my god that's so cute
(00:21:14):
she said to me literally on the phone just now she's like
(00:21:17):
I just want you to be with me forever, mommy.
(00:21:20):
Oh, that's so precious.
(00:21:24):
That melts my heart.
(00:21:26):
I know.
(00:21:27):
I know.
(00:21:28):
I know.
(00:21:28):
But anyway, we should definitely like brainstorm on how we should do this.
(00:21:35):
It's so funny because literally earlier when I was listening to the We Should All Be Millionaires book,
(00:21:43):
I was at the very end and you have this challenge where like they challenge you to make 10K in 10 days.
(00:21:49):
And it's like brainstorm ways to do this.
(00:21:52):
And I was like, huh, interesting.
(00:21:54):
And so I just started like thinking about different things.
(00:22:00):
And I was like, okay, what could I host?
(00:22:01):
Because it talks about a lot of things like masterminds and stuff like that, retreats.
(00:22:05):
And I was like, what could I do?
(00:22:07):
Because I don't have anything to really teach anybody.
(00:22:10):
Not that I'm actually passionate about, you know.
(00:22:13):
Like, I can't teach people how to talk without an off button.
(00:22:19):
That's just genetic.
(00:22:25):
But then you said it's your dream.
(00:22:28):
And I was like, okay, well, for her, we need to figure out how to make this happen for you.
(00:22:32):
Because, like, you deserve to see your dreams come true.
(00:22:37):
And I feel like that's, like, something that people would be, like, 100% in for.
(00:22:43):
So, yeah.
(00:22:46):
Oh, you're such a sweet hype woman.
(00:22:48):
Your daughter, if she's, like, I know she's like you.
(00:22:50):
That is the sweetest combination.
(00:22:52):
Oh, my God.
(00:22:52):
You guys are so cute.
(00:22:54):
I love it.
(00:23:01):
Okay.
(00:23:02):
So, now that we have gotten all of the
(00:23:13):
basics out of the way let's see i don't even know how to tell how much time we have
(00:23:17):
left so annoying i know there should be like a countdown for real up front with
(00:23:24):
this stuff right oh well okay so what okay
(00:23:41):
after like being on the platform this this time like how long have you been on the
(00:23:46):
platform I joined at the end of May I believe so like two months I think okay okay
(00:23:56):
dang good job I did come with
(00:24:02):
I know,
(00:24:02):
I did come with,
(00:24:03):
I had my little,
(00:24:05):
my existing list that I had ghosted for three years that I brought with me,
(00:24:10):
which I don't think any of them are like,
(00:24:15):
I don't know what they're doing.
(00:24:16):
I have no idea what they think of me.
(00:24:17):
They're probably like, who the hell is this crazy person?
(00:24:20):
Yeah, that's how I feel like about the tiny little list that I brought over too.
(00:24:23):
I think there's probably only like three people like in that whole list that
(00:24:28):
actually read any of my shit.
(00:24:30):
I know.
(00:24:32):
you know what it like made me feel better I was like at least I know I'm not gonna
(00:24:36):
be talking to zero people exactly yes like I was like okay well at least this last
(00:24:42):
year fucking peddling myself all over Facebook and Pinterest and Instagram gave me
(00:24:47):
something yeah exactly so okay
(00:24:58):
Shit.
(00:24:59):
I've completely lost my train of thought.
(00:25:00):
I hate when this happens.
(00:25:02):
Okay.
(00:25:03):
Let's do something fun.
(00:25:08):
What is the weirdest thing about you?
(00:25:10):
And I'll answer so you don't feel alone.
(00:25:13):
Oh, Jesus.
(00:25:13):
Okay.
(00:25:15):
I hate myself,
(00:25:15):
but the first thing that popped into my head when you said that is I can make some
(00:25:21):
of the weirdest facial expressions,
(00:25:23):
which I don't want to do right now.
(00:25:25):
But
(00:25:27):
Okay, you want to know something really funny?
(00:25:29):
I don't even know where I saw.
(00:25:31):
I think it was like a book from the library I got my daughter.
(00:25:35):
And it was like, I think it was Olympic.
(00:25:39):
Or no, what's that thing called?
(00:25:40):
They have the world records.
(00:25:43):
The Guinness Book of World Records?
(00:25:44):
Guinness Book of World Records.
(00:25:46):
And there was this thing in there.
(00:25:47):
I think it's called ghouling.
(00:25:49):
And there's a competition for contorting your face into the weirdest shapes.
(00:25:53):
And Taylor, I'm not kidding you.
(00:25:54):
I was like...
(00:25:56):
i'm normal i'm like you need to tell me there's more of me oh my god it is the i i
(00:26:03):
don't know i've never seen anybody like make the weirdest faces my daughter i'll do
(00:26:07):
it either she thinks it's she's like getting older now and sometimes she thinks
(00:26:10):
it's like mom but she also thinks it's hilarious so very weird i swear like i i
(00:26:18):
swear somehow we are we we are related because like
(00:26:23):
okay so this is a thing about me and it's hilarious because my daughter does it too
(00:26:29):
uh when i was a kid i would like stand in front of the mirror and like just make
(00:26:35):
the strangest faces like you know see how far my tongue can reach in different
(00:26:40):
directions i taught myself like i eventually figured out how to wiggle my ears and
(00:26:45):
that kind of stuff
(00:26:49):
So funny.
(00:26:50):
I know.
(00:26:51):
And like, I'm a very animated talker.
(00:26:53):
I've literally like thrown things and knocked shit over while talking because I'm
(00:26:58):
moving my hands too fucking much.
(00:27:00):
My ex-husband used to hold my hands when I would talk because it pissed him off so much.
(00:27:07):
Red flag.
(00:27:07):
Right?
(00:27:10):
I literally, I wrote down a title for an article, flags that I thought were green that were actually red.
(00:27:15):
Oh my God.
(00:27:17):
That is such a good title.
(00:27:19):
I would read the shit out of that.
(00:27:21):
Yeah, so, but the facial expressions, I make the craziest ones.
(00:27:29):
And Lucy,
(00:27:31):
like,
(00:27:32):
she has,
(00:27:34):
like,
(00:27:34):
this whole world in her head that is not even relevant to everything else outside
(00:27:42):
in reality.
(00:27:43):
And
(00:27:46):
she will just be sitting there and she's like making all of these like super funny
(00:27:52):
faces and she's just thinking about like what it's like if she rode a dragon with
(00:27:58):
her stepsister through the candy cane forest like it's so precious i love it oh i
(00:28:07):
know somehow i raised like this like
(00:28:10):
little doll but I mean we also have our intricacies because that's like all
(00:28:14):
children but the faces I've caught her doing them in the mirror oh my god that's so
(00:28:25):
crazy how genetics work that's fascinating yeah yeah so cute
(00:28:31):
Well, and I've learned so much about genetics within the last like six, seven years, six years, really.
(00:28:40):
Cause like it,
(00:28:40):
I mean,
(00:28:40):
everything started with learning all about the stuff with Lily and like how all of
(00:28:44):
that happened and how to prevent it and all that stuff.
(00:28:46):
And it just like went off from there.
(00:28:48):
I really enjoy like genetics and epigenetics and that kind of stuff.
(00:28:56):
So it is super interesting to,
(00:28:59):
But I do I do think that there's a little bit of like, oh, we have 10 minutes.
(00:29:05):
OK, that's good to know.
(00:29:06):
We will wrap this up.
(00:29:10):
I do think there's a little there was a little bit of reflecting that she learned
(00:29:13):
how to talk like that because for like.
(00:29:16):
For, like, 14 months, it was really just me and her all day, every day.
(00:29:21):
And I had no one to talk to because I lived in bumfuck nowhere Oklahoma and bumfuck nowhere Texas.
(00:29:27):
And I was alone with just her and the dog.
(00:29:29):
And she was the only thing I had to talk to.
(00:29:31):
So... Talked all day.
(00:29:35):
And, I mean, she was, like, talking, talking by the time she was one.
(00:29:39):
Are you serious?
(00:29:42):
Oh, yeah.
(00:29:42):
Like, she was... She had...
(00:29:45):
like two she could do two full sentences by the time she was 18 months like she can
(00:29:51):
talk her vocabulary is like insane like blows my mind she's cattywampus correctly i
(00:29:58):
was like the fuck that is amazing
(00:30:05):
But,
(00:30:06):
okay,
(00:30:06):
is there anything,
(00:30:07):
like,
(00:30:07):
before we close this up,
(00:30:10):
is there anything that,
(00:30:12):
like,
(00:30:12):
you wanted to ask or wanted to say or wanted to promote or anything like that?
(00:30:17):
I'm terrible with on-the-spot questions.
(00:30:24):
I don't think so.
(00:30:25):
I would just say the message that I guess I always want to promote and that I'm always,
(00:30:30):
like,
(00:30:30):
trying to tell myself and everyone else is just,
(00:30:34):
be yourself,
(00:30:35):
even if it's like messy right now,
(00:30:37):
even if you're not sure what exactly like the next phase of your journey is going
(00:30:42):
to be like,
(00:30:43):
like just do it because that's the only thing that's going to lead to any sense of clarity.
(00:30:46):
It's the only thing that's going to lead to any sense of like peace about yourself
(00:30:51):
and acceptance and all that kind of stuff.
(00:30:52):
So being on Substack these last, you know, two months, cause I've been here for so long.
(00:30:59):
If it's, if it's shown me anything, it is that
(00:31:02):
Nothing feels better than, than being yourself.
(00:31:05):
And that doesn't mean that it's,
(00:31:06):
you know,
(00:31:06):
you're going to figure yourself,
(00:31:07):
yourself out right away that it's going to be like,
(00:31:08):
oh my God,
(00:31:09):
everything is perfect.
(00:31:10):
And I never have like demons in my head that are like,
(00:31:12):
you know,
(00:31:12):
telling me like,
(00:31:13):
oh,
(00:31:13):
you're never going to get anywhere.
(00:31:15):
Definitely doesn't mean that,
(00:31:18):
but it's much better,
(00:31:20):
better than the alternative of,
(00:31:22):
of not doing the thing that,
(00:31:23):
you know,
(00:31:24):
you're meant to be doing.
(00:31:26):
So yeah, I need to hear that.
(00:31:29):
And whoever needs to hear that, that's for you as well.
(00:31:33):
I love it.
(00:31:34):
I love it.
(00:31:34):
And it's 100% true.
(00:31:35):
And I think that is one of the things that I love the most about Substack.
(00:31:44):
Like, the fact that you and I can just sit here and cuss as much as we fucking want.
(00:31:48):
Like, I feel zero need to filter myself at all.
(00:31:52):
And it's really cool because, like, the rest of the platforms, you can't do that.
(00:31:58):
No.
(00:31:58):
Honestly, Taylor, I was so excited to talk to you tonight because I...
(00:32:03):
was like,
(00:32:03):
I don't have to worry about being somebody else or being like professional or worry
(00:32:09):
about what I'm going to say.
(00:32:10):
And that's so rare.
(00:32:11):
I mean, first of all, you're a fabulous human being.
(00:32:14):
Like, I love you.
(00:32:15):
You're amazing.
(00:32:16):
And so like you definitely create that space,
(00:32:20):
but it's also,
(00:32:22):
you know,
(00:32:23):
like Substack also welcomes that and is,
(00:32:25):
you know,
(00:32:26):
conducive to that.
(00:32:27):
So I agree.
(00:32:28):
It's really cool.
(00:32:30):
Yeah, and that means a lot because that's really what my goal is.
(00:32:34):
Like,
(00:32:34):
I just want people to feel like they have a space where they can feel safe to be
(00:32:40):
their weird motherfucking self.
(00:32:42):
Like,
(00:32:43):
for all the people who like to cuss like sailors,
(00:32:45):
but they're pretty little girls,
(00:32:46):
like,
(00:32:47):
we've got you.
(00:32:48):
We've got a little corner for you over here.
(00:32:51):
It's great over here.
(00:32:53):
Right?
(00:32:54):
Like, I'm like, it's great.
(00:32:55):
It's great.
(00:32:56):
So,
(00:32:57):
and,
(00:32:57):
like,
(00:32:57):
I can do things,
(00:32:58):
like,
(00:32:58):
talk about,
(00:32:59):
like,
(00:32:59):
literally have,
(00:32:59):
like,
(00:33:00):
potentially the dead kid club,
(00:33:01):
you know?
(00:33:01):
Like, that shit, like, every other platform has been, like, when I've, like, even thrown that out there.
(00:33:09):
They're just, like, they can't handle the...
(00:33:15):
bluntness of it which is just like what that's what it is all of us have children
(00:33:20):
that died like how do you why do we need to sugarcoat it um so thank you that means
(00:33:29):
a lot and it was an absolute pleasure absolute pleasure talking with you and i'm
(00:33:36):
super excited to work on your uh little uh
(00:33:42):
bucket mastermind which works perfectly with my like love of unfucking shit i love
(00:33:49):
that um and can so you're you're on sub stack and that's about it correct correct
(00:33:57):
yes okay awesome and what is your sub stack handle and it's the newsletter name is
(00:34:03):
shame sandwich correct
(00:34:04):
Yes, and I believe the, it might be actually my name, at Megan Lee, my handle.
(00:34:11):
That's actually a good question.
(00:34:13):
Yeah, I think mine's at Taylor Cecilia Brigg.
(00:34:16):
I just changed the name of my sub stack, though.
(00:34:18):
Did you see that?
(00:34:20):
No, like, just like...
(00:34:24):
i changed it today i think i think it was yesterday i changed it to the chaos
(00:34:28):
chronicles ah i love that but i told you i love that name because i i think that oh
(00:34:34):
no curiosity no this is the curiosity chronicles yes and then okay yeah and then we
(00:34:39):
have the daily chronicles of taylor cecilia brooke and i was like okay let's just
(00:34:42):
call this the fucking cure the chaos chronicles because that's really what it is i
(00:34:46):
create chaos and then i organize it you know
(00:34:49):
That's brilliant.
(00:34:50):
I love that.
(00:34:50):
Thank you.
(00:34:52):
Thank you.
(00:34:53):
All right.
(00:34:54):
Well, it has been an absolute joy.
(00:34:56):
And if you have not checked out Megan,
(00:34:58):
you absolutely need to because she's fucking hilarious and I love her so much and
(00:35:04):
I'm so happy you were able to join me and we will definitely be doing this again.
(00:35:07):
And I think we'll bring in Maggie next time.
(00:35:10):
Oh, I love that idea.
(00:35:13):
And have more than 40 minutes because apparently we need that.
(00:35:16):
So this felt like 20 minutes tops.
(00:35:18):
Like this is crazy.
(00:35:20):
For real.
(00:35:20):
I'm like, I don't understand how this just happened.
(00:35:25):
I love it.
(00:35:26):
Thank you so much for having me on.
(00:35:28):
This was so much fun.
(00:35:30):
You're amazing.
(00:35:31):
Absolutely.
(00:35:32):
Absolutely.
(00:35:32):
All right.
(00:35:33):
I'm going to go ahead and...
Inside the brain 🧠 of Megan Lee and Taylor Cecelia Brook