You can find everything about Andrew here :)
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And we are back.
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This is Taylor with the Curiosity Chronicles.
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And I am here today with a wonderful, wonderful human.
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I have Andrew on the podcast today from Substack.
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And your Substack is great.
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Is it Sparkle Angel Butterfly or Angel Sparkle Butterfly?
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No, it's like Angel Butterfly.
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No, it's like Angel Butterfly.
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There we go.
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I was like, I had it memorized at one point.
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It was like this first string of words that came to me.
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You know what, though?
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I fucking love that.
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My Substack has had like five different names at this point.
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So,
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Andrew,
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I would love if you would tell our listeners just a little bit about you and how you,
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like,
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got to know me,
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how you found me,
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how you met me,
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and just,
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like,
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what your purpose of your Substack is for those non-Substack users out there.
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Okay, great.
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Yeah, my name's Andrew.
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As we said, I have a Substack Snowflake Angel Butterfly.
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I started it beginning of August.
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And yeah,
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I basically started it because in July I came out as non-binary and I'd already
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come out as bisexual,
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but everyone was like still assuming that I was straight and like referring me as
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straight and stuff.
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I was like, I need to like come out, you know?
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like i'm finding myself in these situations where i'm like trying to express you
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know it's like i would just mention you know i was kind of constantly surrounded by
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these like super cis heteronormative men and i would just mention that i had read
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some novel by emily henry or something and they'd look at me like i was just a
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freak but the problem was it wasn't just emily henry it was like all these things
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that i was constantly not allowed to mention without people being like alarmed
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um and yeah i wasn't just that so many things obviously over like the course of a
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few years like actually the post that i wrote that really describes like a lot of
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how i came to this transformation was last night and it's called uh phoebe bridgers
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and the music that blossomed my queerness and i really feel like music was so
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essential but either way
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At the end of July,
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people were telling me like,
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you know,
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you're mentally ill,
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you're spending too much time on the internet.
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And my friend who, this guy like, who had claimed to be my best friend for like 17 years.
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And I think he's like a bizarre case study of a man because literally like we read
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tarot together,
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we watched Buffy together,
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we had matching Buffy shirts,
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we went to see Haim,
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we went to see Phoebe.
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Um, that's not even, that doesn't even do justice to the list of things we did together.
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And then as soon as I just want to buy like a pink boy genius shirt,
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he's just like,
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dude,
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you cannot do that.
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You cannot do that.
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So I just needed to express myself and that angel butterfly emerged.
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I was so sick of people telling me that I was faking or that I wasn't being me.
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And I just started this blog.
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The blog has in some ways made things worse.
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Like a lot of people are like really freaked out.
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They.
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Like these men who are like online,
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like sharing memes about how their entire emotional state is determined by college football.
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Oh my goodness, that's so annoying.
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Saying that I need to be like institutionalized because I'm wearing bracelets or whatever.
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So I just find it so absurd.
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But yeah, that's basically the story behind my blog.
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Well,
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hey,
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I am not only proud of you for starting this journey,
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but for doing it in such a vulnerable way.
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You're really pioneering spaces for younger kids.
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And that is really, you know...
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really important because I think you know one of the things I really like about you
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is just your whole look and your energy you know like to me you really embody what
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like a non-binary person is really trying to express themselves as and I think a
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lot of younger kids are really confused about how to where to even fit in all of
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this and so just having people
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That's why I love Substack is there's just so many different people out there.
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And that is what we need.
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You know, you needed a kid as a kid.
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You needed,
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you know,
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a teenager,
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an adult who could have shown you these things or at least given you a space to.
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learn and read about them you know when i was in my 20s i would have killed for
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someone who thinks about their body the way i do who you know has gone through the
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trauma that i've gone through i would have killed to have someone just to lean on
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or read simply to have a soulless and you're providing that and i really think
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that's awesome thank you i really appreciate that i oh and i forgot to answer
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before i build on that i forgot to say how i met you oh i feel like i have to
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algorithm somehow like i feel like i don't even know who found his sub stack first
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somebody commented on somebody's and we were messaging and yeah i read a bunch of
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your posts like it starts like when you're like six five seven years old yeah
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they're so terrible too literally sitting on the porch just like reading reading
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your blog for like an hour like last the other saturday so
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I enjoy it.
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And like you also have struggled with a lot of the same kind of identity issues that I have.
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So like you say,
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like finding people on Substack,
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like you're definitely also one of those writers that I'm so grateful to be able to add,
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relate to.
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So yeah, thank you.
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That's like the sweetest fucking compliment.
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Thank you.
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That's just all, that's all I want.
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I want people to have a space where they can feel safe.
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Like, you know, and their, their space might not be my space, but I want them to have a space.
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So let me help you find that space wherever it is.
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For sure.
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Yeah.
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You had also mentioned like kids out there.
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And I think about like another post I wrote that,
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this,
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my choice at 16,
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stop masturbating or burn in hell,
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which basically like I,
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it's honestly,
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to me,
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it's insane that I came to this point because I was raised like completely
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fundamentalist Christian.
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I thought I was going to go to hell for masturbating.
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I cut out all my friends from my life because I thought they were like dragging me down into sin.
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And I was just terrified all the time.
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I just like honestly in the long run like it's being exposed to other people and
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other ideas that helps me break out of that it takes a long time but I would say
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like any kid out there who's like 16,
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15 who seems like they're just a hopeless lost cause like crazy conservative like
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they're not that they're they can change and they can change I'm proof of it I've
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changed and even my parents who
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come across as really awful people in that post.
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Like they're completely different now than they are in that post.
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People can change.
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I truly believe that.
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It doesn't mean you have to let them be around you while they're dealing with their shit.
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I'm really happy that I was able to share that experience.
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I've been trying to write it for so long and I finally figured out how to write it.
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And I'm so glad that like, there's maybe some kid out there who will read it and feel like,
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maybe they'll just see the madness of like what they're being put through.
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I don't know, you know, or it'll help them think through identity, you know?
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Yeah.
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No.
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And I'm thinking you're you think you, you said,
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know somehow maybe they'll find it and i'm thinking if you're using tags like
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they're gonna find it if they're google searching something and you you know gender
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queerness like questioning gender identity like anything like that that stuff will
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start popping up because it's you know substack is getting bigger and bigger and
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bigger and it's so it's ranking higher and higher in the google searches so like
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those kids are gonna find you and it's just
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Oh, I would have loved to have someone tell me that, you know, when I was like 18, 19.
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Oh, by the way, just because you like girls does not mean you're going to go to hell.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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I, it's amazing.
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I mean, there's kids who are growing up all over the country.
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Like single adult in their life is telling them they're going to go to hell.
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I know.
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Isn't it awful?
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Or if they don't act like a,
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perfect girl or a perfect boy they're gonna go to hell like this is being told to
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kids for years and years and years and it's just seen as like a normal thing like i
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you probably you maybe you have seen some references to my i actually already
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mentioned it when we were talking my friend my self-declined best friend like yeah
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the case study of of a man basically like
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He,
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you know,
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he literally just lets,
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he just in the name of family peace,
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like he's not,
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he's an atheist and he lets his son be taught by the grandparents at this crazy ass
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church that he's gonna burn in hell and his son is terrified.
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And he's just like, it's not a big deal.
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You know, you have to find a way to make it work with
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the family and it's just like your son is scared of hell and you don't even care
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because you think that you need to comply with these family rules basically that
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are just made up so that these grandparents can terrify your son like
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It's just like,
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when I think about him,
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I just,
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and all the like external things that we did together,
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like the button,
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tarot,
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it's like,
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and him looking at his son scared of hell and thinking,
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I'm just gonna let this keep happening.
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It's like, you don't see feelings, you just see things.
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Yeah, yeah, that's so true because that's kind of how my parents are.
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So both my parents were raised fairly religious,
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my dad more so than my mom,
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but neither of them really had favorable feelings about the church after.
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Um,
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but for some reason they thought it was a good idea to just let the grandparents
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take me to church all the time.
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Yeah.
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Just let them have full authority over your.
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Yeah.
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And like my mom went to a private Catholic high school.
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She knows how insane.
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like her beliefs on religion and a higher creator are wild because of all the
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different like religions she's experienced from methodist to catholicism like
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everything in between um but they were both still like yeah that that's a good
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thing to send our daughter off to do right like it's the yeah that's like the other
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thing it's like
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you know,
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then you have kids and,
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you know,
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they're like,
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I feel like when you have kids,
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it's like,
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you know,
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I have a 15 month old son.
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I feel like when you have kids,
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it's like these older people,
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they're like,
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this is,
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you know,
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you've kind of like,
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it's kind of like an Amish person or like a year and do whatever they want.
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It's like in your 20s, you know, you do whatever you want.
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You're like an Amish person.
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Yeah.
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And then you come back in your thirties,
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you have kids and now they're like,
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okay,
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now you're gonna baptize your kids and you're gonna tell you,
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and you're gonna,
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you're gonna,
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you're gonna join.
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Don't you want, like, don't you want that community we gave you as a child?
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No, I don't.
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Like not.
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So also like having a son for me, it was like,
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i need to be my authentic self because if i'm not and i'm in this it's because it's
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not just like now it's not just like oh i'm uncomfortable because i present as a
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cishet man and people react weird when i talk about the things i like it's not just
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that now it's like if i continue to pretend to be a cishet man like basically i'm
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just gonna end up being incorporated into this scheme to like
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turn my son into another man like yeah man who doesn't say i love you a man who
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doesn't hug anyone a man who just shakes hands and a man who just such bullshit
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Yeah.
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It's so frustrating because there's this whole generation where they think that
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it's culturally appropriate to just shut everything down in a man.
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And the only thing men are supposed to do is provide and exist.
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Yeah.
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I just, I don't know very many men my age that are okay with that.
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Even if they are like a really,
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you know,
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cis heterosexual man,
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a lot of them still aren't okay with this.
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Like, that's all you do, you know?
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And I love that that's changing.
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And I love that you finally chose to because of your son.
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And it's so, so cool.
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Cause I literally was like,
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my daughter was my last straw when I realized I needed to get out of my marriage
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because I was like,
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she can't grow up with a mom who's unhappy with a mom who doesn't know how to stand
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up for herself.
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Like my daughter already struggles with standing up for herself and being assertive.
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Like I need to be able to demonstrate that for her.
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And I wasn't.
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And so I,
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You know, the exact same thing.
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I don't care who she becomes or what she does,
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you know,
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as long as she's not murdering people,
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like she can do whatever she wants.
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Right.
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But I want to be my most authentic self for her so she can learn how to be her most authentic self.
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I think that's so, I love that you said that.
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That is exactly the conclusion I came to.
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It's like, I have to be my authentic self.
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I have to be comfortable.
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I remember, because my social anxiety before I came out was so extreme.
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And it's honestly incredible.
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Anyone out there who's struggling with identity and also social anxiety, I have other issues.
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I have PTSD that's medicated and things like that.
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my social anxiety was still there even with my medication before I came home.
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And literally,
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once I started walking outside and just knowing this is me,
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I am presenting as myself,
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like I felt so much more comfortable.
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But what made me want to take, like overcome that social anxiety was just what you said.
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It was my son.
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And I remember I saw this meme.
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I saw this meme that was like, or no, it wasn't a meme.
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I think I was just, you know, you're like, same way that you're online Googling if you have somebody...
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I was only Googling like sources of social anxiety or something like that.
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And I found this, there's like, one of the causes is modeling social anxiety, modeling it for your kid.
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If your kid observes you behaving anxiously in social situations,
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you're basically communicating to your child that
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it's social situations are scary social situations are dangerous and they kind of
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internalize that because they notice that when you're not with strangers you act
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like yourself you act happy and then when you go out into the world with your kids
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suddenly you're this anxious person so your kid thinks you know the world is scary
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and that really freaked me out i'm like i do not so i was just like i have to i
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have to be myself yeah maybe in these situations where someone's like
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saying these things,
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looking at my son and saying like,
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oh,
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you're a boy and therefore,
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you know,
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the whole fucking alphabet and beyond.
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And I'm just standing there because I'm too scared to express myself.
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Like now I'm expressing myself.
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And that was also the purpose behind the blog of like saying, this is me.
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Yeah.
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You know,
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there's people who think that I like my friend told me like that I was behaving
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inappropriately for a father,
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which just makes me a lot of parents.
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They don't think like you just said, they don't think they need to be authentic.
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They just think they need to like implement certain procedures.
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It's not what parenting is.
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Yeah.
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So implementing certain procedures is what teachers are for.
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Yeah.
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Right.
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So it's,
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I don't know,
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it's been so eye-opening the last like two months,
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the way I feel like in my life there's just been,
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I keep thinking about like when I was a kid,
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I was used to envision like the final judgment when Jesus would just like send all
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the sinners to the left and send all the
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Righteous to the right.
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And I feel like I'm almost at this final judgment and I'm just being myself.
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And some people are just like, ew, you know, you know, like horrified.
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And like Substack's an example of how I've like you,
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for example,
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like I've met so many people who are inspired by my writing and encouraging me.
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I've met so many other writers who like I have grown as a writer on Substack because
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Like I've seen how other writers integrate aesthetics into their posts.
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I see play around with different topics and it's made me realize there's basically
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no structure that I have to follow at all.
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And that is one of my most favorite parts because I don't know if you've gathered this about me.
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I don't like stupid rules.
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Like if it doesn't make sense, I don't want to fucking do it.
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I don't care what you said.
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Like this isn't logical.
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There's no connection to why we have to do this.
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so like sub stack there are no rules and i love that so much and they wanted it to
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be that way they wanted a place for people to have authentic conversations like
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this without fear of being ridiculed or shut down or doxxed or you know all the
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things that happen to people on the internet yeah and it's it is it's amazing it's
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like this free place and
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I feel like there's just the trolls are just kind of kept away.
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Like if I were to go on Substack and post some trolling posts for a week,
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I would just lose subscribers and nobody would like posts and I would just recede
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into nothingness.
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Like it's not like Twitter where you're like going like wildfire because you're
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posting some crazy ass shit just to piss someone off.
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But there's still funny stuff on there like,
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I don't know if you follow Corey Banana, but she's always posting these hilarious notes.
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No, but I'm going to write that down so I can go follow her.
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She posted a note that was talking about this guy who was into her.
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And I guess this guy sent her a text correcting the form of your that she used,
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saying,
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aren't you an author?
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Aren't you a writer?
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Oh, I would punch him in the fucking face.
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Yeah, typical man.
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Writing, it's like we were just talking about.
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writing is best when there's no rules for this man writing isn't about expression
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and it's not about feelings writing is about like compliance with showing how well
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you can comply with technical management sorry and that's what school's for like i
(00:19:10):
know like i it's but i started realizing like when i was like in the months before
(00:19:16):
i was coming out i was talking to
(00:19:19):
I feel like boomers have just lost their minds on a new level recently,
(00:19:24):
especially when it comes to trans people.
(00:19:26):
They just are not able to process what's happening somehow.
(00:19:32):
Well, my best friend actually- No, not all boomers.
(00:19:38):
Boomer is not an age, by the way.
(00:19:39):
Boomer is a cultural phenomenon.
(00:19:43):
My friend who was 35, I realized he actually is a boomer.
(00:19:48):
Yeah, they're... It's a culture.
(00:19:50):
It's not like a... It's so different from millennials because you have, like... Like, I...
(00:19:58):
I'm a basic white bitch millennial.
(00:20:00):
You know, like that's different from, you know, someone else.
(00:20:06):
And so,
(00:20:07):
but my best friend was saying that she thinks that the boomers are so psychotic,
(00:20:11):
like a good majority of them is because of all of the lead they were exposed to.
(00:20:15):
Oh, a hundred percent.
(00:20:16):
I've read about this too.
(00:20:18):
You know, lead poisoning, it, it decreases your empathy too.
(00:20:22):
And your intelligence.
(00:20:24):
Yeah.
(00:20:26):
And that's what I realized is like, they actually believe that words are real things.
(00:20:31):
Like they don't, they don't understand.
(00:20:33):
They literally don't understand.
(00:20:35):
Words are just made up to describe things we see that we know for sure what we're
(00:20:40):
actually looking at because.
(00:20:42):
Yeah.
(00:20:43):
We can't see anything from outside our senses.
(00:20:45):
So we call things things.
(00:20:47):
We say that's a man, that's a woman.
(00:20:49):
Yeah.
(00:20:49):
Everything's just made up.
(00:20:52):
You know,
(00:20:53):
these boomers in my family,
(00:20:54):
they just,
(00:20:55):
they,
(00:20:56):
like I mentioned,
(00:20:57):
like,
(00:20:58):
like one of them told me like,
(00:20:59):
they have a new word now.
(00:21:00):
Queer.
(00:21:01):
What even is that?
(00:21:02):
Oh my goodness.
(00:21:03):
Where have you been?
(00:21:04):
You're like six, you're like over 60 years old.
(00:21:07):
And it's like, there's only a man.
(00:21:09):
And they're like literally like pulling out the dictionary.
(00:21:11):
Like, oh my God.
(00:21:13):
The definition of a woman is the definition of a man.
(00:21:17):
It's non-binary in the dictionary.
(00:21:18):
It's like, do you not understand that the dictionary was just created by a room of dudes?
(00:21:23):
Like, are you serious?
(00:21:28):
The straight up acceptance that they have, like they don't question anything.
(00:21:34):
If you tell them that's poisonous, they're like, cool, that's poisonous.
(00:21:38):
Yeah, for sure.
(00:21:38):
It could be the fucking best thing in the world for them.
(00:21:42):
look at how they grew up.
(00:21:43):
They grew up like just basically,
(00:21:44):
first of all,
(00:21:45):
they didn't have the internet and some were like severely abused,
(00:21:49):
honestly.
(00:21:49):
Yeah.
(00:21:50):
Oh, absolutely.
(00:21:51):
Wasn't even taken seriously until like the sixties.
(00:21:54):
I was looking it up recently for a post.
(00:21:56):
And yeah,
(00:21:58):
they they just they were fed it's you know what i think it goes back to is the cold
(00:22:04):
war propaganda like and like constant cold war propaganda teaching them that
(00:22:09):
america was this perfectly righteous nation and that the soviets were these like
(00:22:13):
completely evil degenerate people and like they just have spent their entire lives
(00:22:19):
imagining that they're a part of this like great struggle between light and
(00:22:22):
darkness and
(00:22:24):
Literally, like, look at their politics.
(00:22:26):
Like,
(00:22:26):
after the Soviet Union collapsed,
(00:22:28):
9-11 happens,
(00:22:29):
and for,
(00:22:30):
like,
(00:22:30):
15,
(00:22:31):
even to this day,
(00:22:32):
the obsession with Muslims has not ended.
(00:22:35):
They're obsessed.
(00:22:36):
They always have to.
(00:22:38):
They grew up learning that kind of politics, and that's just how they see the world.
(00:22:42):
Yeah,
(00:22:43):
and it was so confusing to me as a child because,
(00:22:47):
so my dad's parents are definitely more of your,
(00:22:50):
like,
(00:22:50):
typical Southern,
(00:22:53):
like,
(00:22:55):
christian small town type people and my grandmother eventually you know really
(00:23:03):
opened her horizons when horizons whatever uh when her brother finally decided to
(00:23:10):
come out that he was gay and the rest of us have known it for a very long time why
(00:23:17):
else do you take a business trip for three weeks to palm springs every year um
(00:23:26):
my parents knew right away their eyes from what they don't want to look at right
(00:23:30):
right yeah so but my dad he he had no tolerance for racism he had no tolerance for
(00:23:41):
really any kind of discrimination that would happen and both my parents were like
(00:23:45):
that and you know obviously
(00:23:49):
Like you've seen,
(00:23:50):
they've had their issues,
(00:23:52):
but in the fundamentals,
(00:23:54):
you know,
(00:23:55):
that kind of stuff,
(00:23:55):
they grew up seeing some really horrible things.
(00:23:58):
You know,
(00:23:58):
my dad watched the captain of the football team at his school have multiple crosses
(00:24:05):
burned on his yard because he asked the white girl cheerleader captain to prom.
(00:24:12):
Yeah, that was normal when they were young.
(00:24:16):
Like that was normal.
(00:24:18):
Yeah.
(00:24:19):
And like my parents,
(00:24:20):
so my parents were like kids in the 80s and it was still normal in the Midwest for
(00:24:25):
shit like that to happen.
(00:24:28):
And and then on the other coin,
(00:24:31):
my mom's parents were very progressive,
(00:24:36):
unlike normal people from their generation,
(00:24:39):
for sure.
(00:24:40):
now i will say that they were from canada so that may have skewed some things but
(00:24:46):
you know my grandparents were always they were definitely always left-leaning like
(00:24:52):
always left-leaning always very forward thinking um
(00:24:56):
But there was still things about them that was so boomer-esque and it was the
(00:25:01):
obsession with politics and the obsession with being skinny and just all those
(00:25:09):
random things.
(00:25:09):
And so some of those rubbed off onto my parents.
(00:25:12):
And I think that's probably why I ended up at a church and ended up with all the,
(00:25:18):
I know that's why I ended up with the body dysmorphia issues.
(00:25:22):
um right but it it's it's crazy how like just how those people exist like i don't
(00:25:33):
understand i don't understand they don't reflect on anything i mean they literally
(00:25:39):
they believe they believe completely and sincerely in everything they were told
(00:25:45):
about the world everything they just believe all of it they believe
(00:25:49):
They just, they're, I mean, it's, I don't understand.
(00:25:53):
It's crazy to me.
(00:25:54):
Like they have,
(00:25:56):
some of them have 10 years left alive,
(00:25:59):
Max,
(00:25:59):
and they're literally spending all their time watching cable news.
(00:26:02):
All of it.
(00:26:03):
Right.
(00:26:04):
Like you said, the boomer characteristic, obsessed with politics.
(00:26:09):
Like that's where they can find their, they're just so obsessed with this good versus evil showdown.
(00:26:14):
I know.
(00:26:15):
I know they're on the bad side.
(00:26:16):
Right.
(00:26:19):
Oh, it's, it's interesting.
(00:26:22):
You brought up the topic about how, you know, the dictionary was just written by a bunch of dudes.
(00:26:27):
Well, it's almost the Bible.
(00:26:29):
And I actually, I've started a post.
(00:26:33):
I'm really excited,
(00:26:34):
but I want to do some like serious digging so I can actually like really prove,
(00:26:39):
not prove my point,
(00:26:40):
but get my point across.
(00:26:42):
But this idea has been tumbling around in my head for a few weeks now.
(00:26:46):
Um,
(00:26:48):
You know, I don't think the Bible is actually what people think the Bible is.
(00:26:53):
I think it was a story.
(00:26:55):
It was presented as a story that was created by a bunch of old men that were rich.
(00:27:03):
But basically, it was a story of insanity to prove why you needed to do these things.
(00:27:11):
But all they really are are just things to make life easier, you know, from...
(00:27:18):
gluttony like don't be gluttonous because you'll get diabetes and you'll die young
(00:27:22):
and like they didn't know that's what it was but they knew if you were gluttonous
(00:27:26):
in different areas eventually it would lead to death you know missionary sex well
(00:27:31):
i'm assuming that was actually some kind of health precaution like they're like hey
(00:27:36):
by the way only have sex this way like
(00:27:40):
I think you're 100% right.
(00:27:42):
I love that point.
(00:27:44):
You've got me thinking about the book of Leviticus.
(00:27:46):
Oh, I started spiraling.
(00:27:49):
Leviticus, what a ridiculous book.
(00:27:51):
But then you remember, these people who would have been reading Leviticus 3,000 years ago,
(00:27:57):
didn't know and they they needed they were not just them 3 000 years ago it's the
(00:28:03):
same behavior as people today people want some kind of certainty and in a world
(00:28:07):
where you have no science no real knowledge of what anything is like you don't even
(00:28:12):
know what the sky is you don't even know what the stars are right and then you're
(00:28:17):
given yeah do this yeah follow these rules and don't think about anything else and
(00:28:22):
i think yeah i think that's really appealing in that sense
(00:28:26):
Oh, for sure.
(00:28:27):
And we evolved because of that,
(00:28:32):
I think,
(00:28:33):
to need an intense amount of structure that humans don't actually need.
(00:28:38):
But because it's been imposed on us for so long, we have adapted and feel like we do need that structure.
(00:28:46):
Right.
(00:28:48):
When in reality, we need to create our own structure for our own needs.
(00:28:52):
Yeah.
(00:28:53):
Yeah,
(00:28:54):
we're like,
(00:28:56):
honestly,
(00:28:57):
I don't like evolutionary psychologists very much because a lot of them are like
(00:29:01):
super transphobic on the basis of saying,
(00:29:03):
this is how cavemen lived.
(00:29:06):
But you know, that's like Peterson's whole thing.
(00:29:10):
you know,
(00:29:10):
he's not an evolutionary psychologist,
(00:29:12):
but he's in that same kind of camp of like,
(00:29:15):
I think there was a Substack post about this actually the other day that was in the
(00:29:18):
top posts in culture.
(00:29:20):
I don't remember who wrote it,
(00:29:21):
but it was like about how Jordan Peterson,
(00:29:23):
like he literally says like,
(00:29:25):
well,
(00:29:25):
men have always been in control.
(00:29:27):
That's like his whole position.
(00:29:30):
So gross.
(00:29:31):
it's like the boomer obsession with like um america is the greatest country in the
(00:29:35):
world oh yeah and they don't even they what's crazy about it is like i remember
(00:29:42):
like six years ago my friend it was like right at like my friend's dad trump voter
(00:29:47):
not the friend i've been talking about different friends um was like coming at me
(00:29:51):
on facebook because i had posted some i used to post such crazy on facebook but i
(00:29:56):
had posted something about how america wasn't the greatest country in the world or
(00:30:00):
something
(00:30:02):
and this really triggered a lot of these boomers just saying that so this one is
(00:30:06):
like coming at me in the comments and at no point will he tell me exactly why
(00:30:11):
america is the best country in the world yeah like because they can't articulate it
(00:30:15):
abstract language because that's the cold war propaganda these people were best
(00:30:20):
freedom democracy like they don't like we don't even have a real democracy
(00:30:25):
Yeah, it's so delusional.
(00:30:27):
They've spent their lives looking away from reality.
(00:30:36):
Like look, I come back to the Cold War.
(00:30:39):
I'm gonna write up a post about the Cold War at some point,
(00:30:41):
but like they,
(00:30:42):
the whole fucking Cold War,
(00:30:45):
they believed that America was good and great.
(00:30:48):
And all the while America was supporting dictators.
(00:30:51):
Like look at today, boomers so angry about people coming here from Central America.
(00:30:58):
And if you look, I actually wrote a post about this that's a ways back.
(00:31:02):
Central America, the countries we have fucked and forgotten about.
(00:31:05):
In the 80s,
(00:31:06):
the president completely destroyed Guatemala,
(00:31:10):
El Salvador,
(00:31:11):
Nicaragua,
(00:31:12):
destroyed those countries,
(00:31:14):
sunk them into warfare.
(00:31:16):
Literally,
(00:31:17):
Reagan was funding death squads in El Salvador that were literally completely destroyed,
(00:31:24):
like 5,000 villages.
(00:31:26):
And what happens when the war is over?
(00:31:28):
You've got all these young men everywhere with guns.
(00:31:30):
Who put these young men there with guns?
(00:31:32):
Who funded that?
(00:31:33):
Yeah, we did.
(00:31:35):
We did in the name of what?
(00:31:37):
In the name of freedom, in the name of the glory of America.
(00:31:40):
Yeah.
(00:31:41):
Don't go any further than that.
(00:31:42):
Like they won't look at anything beneath that.
(00:31:45):
No, and it's all so fear-based.
(00:31:47):
Like, all of that was done because of this fear of not being the world police.
(00:31:55):
Like, it's disgusting to me.
(00:31:59):
We are unable to recognize, not we, I feel like pretty much anyone who's younger than 55, you know?
(00:32:08):
Yeah.
(00:32:11):
understands this pipes yeah yeah but like we are actively making ourselves worse
(00:32:21):
and winning doesn't mean we're the best yeah especially when you win through
(00:32:27):
methods of you know control and damage and just straight torture literally torture
(00:32:36):
they've been the amount of people that were tortured for no reason
(00:32:40):
Like, yeah, two million.
(00:32:42):
It's I think it's like what?
(00:32:43):
Two million Iraqis died.
(00:32:46):
And the statistic that the and everything with ISIS.
(00:32:50):
Oh, yeah.
(00:32:52):
Why did ISIS take so much territory?
(00:32:54):
Because the U.S.
(00:32:56):
just decided that it was going to go to Iraq and plunge the entire country into chaos.
(00:33:00):
Yeah.
(00:33:00):
Like.
(00:33:01):
And so that gave them the opportunity to walk right in.
(00:33:04):
Right.
(00:33:04):
Because there's no, there's no government.
(00:33:07):
Like if the government, a gang or a fundamentalist group, basically, like that's what's going to happen.
(00:33:13):
Like somebody's going to take power.
(00:33:15):
And it was literally, um, and yeah,
(00:33:19):
Yeah, just Israel.
(00:33:20):
Think about Palestine.
(00:33:23):
I can't talk about that without getting infuriated because I just don't understand on so many.
(00:33:31):
I literally had to stop listening to NPR because I couldn't handle the news
(00:33:37):
information on,
(00:33:38):
especially because Israel is ruthless with their attacks,
(00:33:42):
like straight ruthless.
(00:33:45):
And the amount of children that are being killed, I can't handle that.
(00:33:50):
I also don't,
(00:33:52):
I don't read the news about Palestine right now because I actually just read this
(00:33:57):
like 600 page history that I really recommend.
(00:34:00):
It's called Enemies and Neighbors.
(00:34:04):
And it's a history of the conflict between Arabs and Jews in time.
(00:34:11):
Okay.
(00:34:11):
He presents, it's very dense and well-researched.
(00:34:17):
He presents the Jewish perspective, or the Israeli Jewish perspective.
(00:34:21):
I don't want to list all Jews.
(00:34:22):
Yeah, fair.
(00:34:24):
He presents the Israeli perspective.
(00:34:27):
He quotes them, their justifications for Zionism.
(00:34:31):
But as you read and you see,
(00:34:34):
Like they would, like these people, these people were completely driven out of their homes.
(00:34:38):
Their property was taken from them.
(00:34:41):
They were people who like literally the line between Palestine and Israel was just
(00:34:45):
drawn one day right through their farm for years.
(00:34:50):
And they just lost their entire livelihood and they lost everything.
(00:34:53):
and they have no citizenship and no- Which is just so fucked.
(00:34:57):
Like it's so fucked up.
(00:34:59):
And what really pissed me off earlier this year is this whole thing they like to say,
(00:35:04):
like this other boomer I know who was like,
(00:35:07):
oh yeah,
(00:35:07):
you know what they say,
(00:35:08):
the pro-Palestine people,
(00:35:10):
they say queers for Palestine.
(00:35:12):
You think queers would have any rights in Palestine?
(00:35:14):
And it's like, how are you talking about the rights of anybody in Palestine?
(00:35:19):
Right?
(00:35:20):
You're completely fine with a situation where any Palestinian teenager can be
(00:35:26):
arbitrarily arrested on the street and locked up in a cell and never charged.
(00:35:31):
You're completely fine with that.
(00:35:33):
For no reason.
(00:35:35):
Israel is a democracy.
(00:35:36):
No, it's not.
(00:35:38):
It's a dictatorship.
(00:35:40):
We come back to this fucking meaningless word that the boomers are obsessed with.
(00:35:44):
Democracy.
(00:35:44):
It's absolutely nothing.
(00:35:47):
I'll never forget the first time I learned what a real democracy was.
(00:35:53):
I was young.
(00:35:56):
And I remember learning about it and just being so angry because that was not what
(00:36:02):
was happening in our country.
(00:36:03):
And I did not understand.
(00:36:05):
And, you know, I think it was obviously after 9-11.
(00:36:08):
And I know...
(00:36:12):
I mean, I know it impacted so many of us in so many different ways.
(00:36:17):
It's, you know, we unfortunately just had one traumatic thing after another happen as kids.
(00:36:23):
And so,
(00:36:25):
but it just,
(00:36:26):
all I can think about every time I would learn something new about American history
(00:36:30):
and American politics,
(00:36:32):
it just made me angry because we're being deceived.
(00:36:36):
Yeah.
(00:36:36):
Yeah.
(00:36:37):
It's all, it's just, it's crazy to think about all the debates right now about teaching history.
(00:36:44):
Oh my God.
(00:36:46):
Here's a story like that I'm also going to write a post about soon.
(00:36:51):
Several years ago,
(00:36:52):
maybe 10 years ago,
(00:36:53):
my friends and I went to Nashville and we went to visit,
(00:36:57):
we went to this plantation museum.
(00:36:59):
It was like on a plantation.
(00:37:00):
You'd think they're going to show,
(00:37:01):
I mean,
(00:37:02):
to me going to a plantation museum should be like going to like a
(00:37:06):
a holocaust museum or like a yes yeah i've been to concentration camps in germany
(00:37:13):
like that was kind of the experience i would think that you would get yeah well not
(00:37:18):
at all there was literally this giant well-preserved house i guess it's privately
(00:37:22):
owned by these people the descendants of the owners there's a bunch of rocking
(00:37:27):
chairs it's all like pristine and white columns up colonial architect like
(00:37:31):
beautiful architecture great white supremacy there's
(00:37:35):
Yeah, it's all white too.
(00:37:37):
All the walls, everything.
(00:37:39):
Of course.
(00:37:40):
And then there's like this,
(00:37:41):
these 12 rocking chairs and those old white people just sitting on the rocking chairs,
(00:37:45):
gazing upon the fields.
(00:37:46):
Like they look so happy.
(00:37:48):
And my friends and I were like, what the fuck is this?
(00:37:50):
And on the tour, this guy, this woman says, doesn't mention any slaves ever, the entire tour, not once.
(00:38:01):
So we asked about the slaves.
(00:38:03):
My friend raised her hand.
(00:38:04):
she's very brave, it was a very large group, but she asked like, what about the slaves?
(00:38:08):
And,
(00:38:09):
you know,
(00:38:09):
we have just spent 10 minutes standing at the bottom of the stairs and right to our,
(00:38:13):
just to the right of us is this painting of this black boy with a horse and the
(00:38:19):
black boy is like taking care of the horse and he's clearly a slave,
(00:38:23):
right?
(00:38:23):
And the only thing that this woman is talking about
(00:38:27):
is how proud this plantation is of its horses.
(00:38:30):
She's like literally pointing at this picture,
(00:38:32):
doesn't say one word about the human being in it and talks on and on and on about
(00:38:37):
how this horse was one of our finest horses.
(00:38:39):
And there's this many Kentucky Derby winners descended from this horse and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
(00:38:45):
And then when she was asked about the slaves,
(00:38:47):
she said,
(00:38:48):
actually the enslaved people,
(00:38:50):
I do think that that's something we should say,
(00:38:52):
because I feel like it's just a better thing to say than defining someone as a slave.
(00:38:56):
When she starts talking about the enslaved people,
(00:38:58):
she says,
(00:39:00):
yeah,
(00:39:01):
after they were actually really happy here.
(00:39:03):
In fact, we had some programs to teach them how to read.
(00:39:05):
And after the civil war,
(00:39:08):
some of them even asked to stay on and the owners were happy to hire them back on.
(00:39:12):
It was insane.
(00:39:13):
And then there's these cabins where the enslaved people slept and you go into these cabins,
(00:39:18):
it's not on the tour.
(00:39:19):
You have to walk off away from the house.
(00:39:23):
And it's an exhibit inside the cabin created by a bunch of white fifth graders
(00:39:28):
about what a glamorous life these enslaved people had in this cabin and how they
(00:39:32):
learned and how they had a school and how this plantation was so much better than
(00:39:36):
the other ones.
(00:39:38):
Fucking insane is that?
(00:39:40):
And these same people grow up and they're like, oh my God, you're not teaching history.
(00:39:44):
You're teaching propaganda.
(00:39:47):
And finally I understood how is it the case that there can be a plantation museum
(00:39:51):
in Tennessee and it's not like going to a concentration camp.
(00:39:55):
This is what they believe.
(00:39:56):
They think that America was this wonderful place in the 18 fucking 50s.
(00:40:00):
They literally believe that.
(00:40:01):
They're like sitting in their rocking chairs,
(00:40:03):
gazing upon the plantation,
(00:40:05):
just fantasizing that they're plantation owners,
(00:40:08):
I guess.
(00:40:08):
I mean, fuck.
(00:40:12):
We literally didn't even have like...
(00:40:15):
hygiene rules for surgery until almost 1890.
(00:40:19):
So like the fact that there's so much romanticism about that time period is just
(00:40:26):
mind boggling to me because it was not advanced.
(00:40:30):
It was not better.
(00:40:31):
It was not easier.
(00:40:33):
It was not healthier.
(00:40:35):
It was miserable.
(00:40:36):
Even if you were one of the fucking plantation owners,
(00:40:39):
chances are most of your kids were gonna die when they were six months old.
(00:40:43):
I know.
(00:40:43):
Like, how could you want to go back to that time where even at the absolute maximum point of privilege,
(00:40:51):
you're basically compared to art compared to now just like dirt poor like it's so
(00:40:59):
but they love it they romanticize it and they're just convinced america like you
(00:41:03):
were talking about like when when your parents were growing up it's just completely
(00:41:07):
normal these awful things to happen it's like in detroit like around which i grew
(00:41:11):
up i always learned from the boomers
(00:41:15):
You know,
(00:41:15):
in the sixties,
(00:41:16):
basically this is what they say in the sixties,
(00:41:18):
all the black people went crazy and the white people had to leave and they started rioting.
(00:41:21):
And then there's this book,
(00:41:23):
the origins of the urban crisis about history from the thirties to the sixties.
(00:41:28):
It's like another one of those books like enemies and neighbors that really changed how I saw history.
(00:41:34):
What's it called again?
(00:41:35):
Sorry.
(00:41:35):
I have family from Detroit.
(00:41:38):
And that's where my grandparents lived once they moved to the States.
(00:41:45):
So what's that book called again?
(00:41:47):
It's called Origins of the Urban Crisis.
(00:41:50):
And it basically goes from the great migration from the South to around Detroit and
(00:41:56):
other cities through to the ultimate decline of Detroit in the 60s and 70s when
(00:42:01):
people started moving out.
(00:42:02):
And it shows you how as Black people were moving up from the South,
(00:42:08):
the white people in Detroit did everything they could to basically keep them out of
(00:42:11):
their neighborhoods,
(00:42:12):
keep them out of their unions,
(00:42:14):
keep them in the lower paying jobs.
(00:42:16):
And Detroit was just as segregated as a lot of Southern cities.
(00:42:22):
In fact, they even at one point built a literal wall to separate two parts of the city.
(00:42:29):
And in the urban development projects in the 50s,
(00:42:33):
there's this highway in the middle of Detroit,
(00:42:35):
I think 375 maybe,
(00:42:36):
or 275,
(00:42:36):
I don't remember.
(00:42:40):
Basically, it dumps off 75.
(00:42:42):
The only purpose of this highway is so that,
(00:42:44):
you know,
(00:42:45):
people coming from the suburbs who don't want to live in Detroit because they all
(00:42:48):
left once black people started demanding houses.
(00:42:53):
They get to drive into the city on the highway.
(00:42:55):
And so they literally in the 50s destroyed this neighborhood called Black Bottom,
(00:42:59):
which was like this,
(00:43:00):
like.
(00:43:02):
cultural beacon in Black Detroit.
(00:43:04):
And they just took all of it,
(00:43:07):
the government,
(00:43:08):
you know,
(00:43:08):
eminent domain it and destroyed it all and built this highway.
(00:43:13):
And it's still there.
(00:43:14):
It's still like that's still the structure.
(00:43:16):
And I realized this isn't like this.
(00:43:20):
Detroit doesn't exist like it does because of some natural order.
(00:43:25):
These white people literally didn't want to live with black people.
(00:43:30):
If a black person were to move into a white neighborhood,
(00:43:33):
they would often get their house literally fire bombed.
(00:43:36):
And they lived in terror.
(00:43:38):
And these real estate agents consorted to keep black people out of white neighborhoods.
(00:43:44):
And once they couldn't hold it back anymore because of Supreme Court decisions and
(00:43:47):
changes in the law,
(00:43:48):
the white people just fucking left.
(00:43:50):
There's another book about this called White Flight, and it's kind of the same thing, but about Atlanta.
(00:43:56):
I think I've heard about that before, but...
(00:44:00):
You're giving me so much good stuff to read that's not sex, health, or smut.
(00:44:05):
Like, I'm so excited.
(00:44:07):
Well, don't stop reading smut.
(00:44:10):
So I don't even need it anymore.
(00:44:11):
I really only read it to disassociate and try to, like, hype myself up to have sex with my ex-husband.
(00:44:18):
I don't need that anymore.
(00:44:20):
Okay, sweet.
(00:44:22):
So you're ready for, like, a new era.
(00:44:25):
Oh, I really am.
(00:44:27):
It was funny because Noor Nadar asked me, he was like, what was your favorite method of dissociation?
(00:44:33):
And I told him,
(00:44:34):
I was like,
(00:44:34):
before I started smoking weed,
(00:44:36):
it was smart because I could completely disappear into one of those books in the bathtub.
(00:44:40):
I'd spend two hours in the bathtub devouring a book.
(00:44:44):
That is literally what, I hope you'll read my post I put up last night about Phoebe Bridgers.
(00:44:49):
Oh, I'm definitely going to read it because I'm so excited now.
(00:44:52):
It's my favorite thing I've ever created.
(00:44:54):
I'm honestly so happy with it.
(00:44:55):
But that is what Phoebe Bridgers was for me.
(00:44:58):
Like, I don't have to listen to Phoebe Bridgers anymore.
(00:45:00):
I realize,
(00:45:01):
or I still listen to her,
(00:45:02):
but I don't have to listen to her music like so frantically because it kind of
(00:45:06):
served a similar function of like putting me in touch with my true inner self.
(00:45:10):
Yeah.
(00:45:10):
It wasn't smile.
(00:45:12):
It was putting myself with my spiritual self.
(00:45:17):
Now I don't need to disappear into headphones to be in touch with my spiritual self
(00:45:20):
because I'm out so I can just be in touch with my spiritual self.
(00:45:24):
Oh, that's such a beautiful thing.
(00:45:27):
I hate that there is still so much negativity out there and surrounding you right now.
(00:45:33):
That just breaks my fucking heart because you deserve to have people who always
(00:45:37):
support you for your entire life.
(00:45:39):
And I know your son will.
(00:45:42):
You're showing your son genuine, true authenticity and
(00:45:49):
my just watching my girls and seeing how free they feel to be themselves like i
(00:45:56):
can't wait for you to see that when your son gets older because it only gets more
(00:46:01):
fun and i know he's never gonna be afraid to be himself because i'm modeling for
(00:46:06):
him how to be yourself i do want to say one more thing about people in my life
(00:46:12):
I haven't talked so positively, but there are a lot of friends in my life who have supported me.
(00:46:18):
If any of them listen to this, I don't want them to think that I'm like ignoring them.
(00:46:21):
I have a lot of friends who have been there for me.
(00:46:25):
You make a really good point and I'm glad you brought that up because I too often
(00:46:29):
don't talk about the people who were there for me in those really,
(00:46:32):
really awful times.
(00:46:34):
And in my book, it's funny because in my book I do.
(00:46:38):
Yeah.
(00:46:38):
Yeah.
(00:46:39):
It's actually dedicated to a group of girls.
(00:46:42):
One of the dedications to a group of girls that we're,
(00:46:48):
my sanity i mean they kept me alive during that time i don't think i would have i
(00:46:53):
honestly think i probably would have killed myself had it not been for them because
(00:46:57):
in the in the in between between lily dying and getting pregnant with lucy i was
(00:47:04):
miserable purposeless my soul was empty
(00:47:08):
If you look at pictures from me during that time, my eyes are dead, dead.
(00:47:12):
They're dead until recently, but they're dead, dead in those pictures.
(00:47:16):
I can't even imagine.
(00:47:17):
I'm so sorry.
(00:47:18):
I mean, having this on myself, I can't even.
(00:47:22):
I've read your posts about that whole thing.
(00:47:24):
That's brave of you to read it.
(00:47:26):
Thank you.
(00:47:26):
Because it's hard.
(00:47:28):
I know as someone who has a living child that just thinking about those things is awful.
(00:47:32):
I...
(00:47:34):
I constantly have these horrible, gruesome images of what could happen if I'm not careful, you know?
(00:47:39):
It's like, so.
(00:47:42):
I wish I could say those would end.
(00:47:45):
I don't think, no.
(00:47:47):
No,
(00:47:48):
and I think,
(00:47:48):
I honestly think my parents probably still have those fears even with their adult children.
(00:47:53):
Yeah.
(00:47:54):
I think, yeah, for sure.
(00:47:57):
You imagine your kid out there.
(00:47:58):
I mean, yeah, Silas is 30 and I'm like,
(00:48:02):
you know, whatever, I'm not gonna, I'm still gonna be like, oh, I am terrified.
(00:48:08):
You know, I could be like 65, like pulled up and crippled somewhere.
(00:48:12):
He's out exploring the world, you know, in some completely normal country or safe country rather.
(00:48:17):
And I'm thinking, oh my God, he's gonna die, he's gonna get killed.
(00:48:21):
I'm sure that's what's going to happen.
(00:48:25):
Yeah,
(00:48:26):
I,
(00:48:26):
about six months ago,
(00:48:27):
out of nowhere,
(00:48:29):
my daughter has been able to bathe by herself for a very long time.
(00:48:32):
Out of nowhere, I was like, oh my God, I can't leave her unattended.
(00:48:34):
She could drown.
(00:48:35):
Yeah.
(00:48:37):
It's just random shit like that.
(00:48:39):
I could not handle that anxiety on top of the social anxiety.
(00:48:45):
I just, come on, I need to choose.
(00:48:47):
Just keep one of them, please.
(00:48:48):
Oh, yeah.
(00:48:52):
The last five years,
(00:48:55):
I think I finally eliminated a good majority of my social anxiety about two years
(00:49:00):
ago when I switched my meds.
(00:49:03):
But it
(00:49:05):
it's still a work in progress because like, I didn't know who I was.
(00:49:07):
I didn't know who Taylor was.
(00:49:09):
And I had no idea where to even fucking begin to figure that out.
(00:49:13):
Like, I wish there was some kind of like guidebook for that.
(00:49:18):
I feel like that's like medication is done for me.
(00:49:21):
It's like,
(00:49:22):
it kind of just mellows you out for a bit.
(00:49:25):
But eventually,
(00:49:26):
if you're not addressing the real source of your social anxiety,
(00:49:30):
you just get a need to up your dose,
(00:49:32):
which is what I was doing.
(00:49:34):
And it works.
(00:49:35):
You up your dose, you feel fine.
(00:49:37):
But if your thought patterns themselves are just wrong and you're like, yeah, I had that.
(00:49:46):
That's why like being myself,
(00:49:48):
I feel like I've been able to like step away from that social anxiety because.
(00:49:53):
Yeah.
(00:49:54):
you know, you don't have to have those.
(00:49:57):
You're just, yeah, I like myself.
(00:49:58):
And I feel like when I see someone who looks at me like I'm a freak or something.
(00:50:02):
You're like, okay, whatever.
(00:50:03):
I don't need,
(00:50:06):
I'm not going to try to make this person like me because what am I going to get out
(00:50:10):
of this relationship?
(00:50:10):
Yeah, exactly, exactly.
(00:50:14):
Yeah,
(00:50:15):
I,
(00:50:15):
it's funny because I will intentionally wear things that'll make people
(00:50:20):
uncomfortable if I'm going into a situation where the people that
(00:50:24):
could be made uncomfortable.
(00:50:25):
I don't know.
(00:50:27):
Have you actually seen my rainbow glasses?
(00:50:29):
I don't think I have.
(00:50:31):
You have a wide variety of glasses.
(00:50:34):
I watched one of your video posts where you were like in your car wearing your heart glasses.
(00:50:38):
Yes, I have three pairs of heart glasses.
(00:50:41):
That's like perfect.
(00:50:44):
It was so funny because I was like, oh my God, I love your glasses.
(00:50:47):
I need to know where they got them.
(00:50:49):
Mine?
(00:50:50):
Yeah, yours.
(00:50:51):
Or Warby Parker, actually.
(00:50:53):
I love Warby, yep, yep.
(00:50:54):
Yeah, I love them.
(00:50:55):
Like, they're, like, this transparent pink, and it's perfect.
(00:50:59):
I know.
(00:51:00):
Yeah,
(00:51:01):
it's,
(00:51:01):
like,
(00:51:01):
my favorite color,
(00:51:02):
but,
(00:51:02):
like,
(00:51:03):
the transparent,
(00:51:03):
if it was,
(00:51:03):
like,
(00:51:04):
a solid pink,
(00:51:05):
now it,
(00:51:05):
like,
(00:51:05):
matches with everything,
(00:51:07):
you know?
(00:51:07):
Yeah, yep, yeah.
(00:51:11):
Oh,
(00:51:11):
it totally does,
(00:51:11):
though,
(00:51:12):
because I have a pair like that,
(00:51:13):
and I have a pair that's,
(00:51:14):
like,
(00:51:14):
clear,
(00:51:14):
clear.
(00:51:15):
That's the pair that I wear, like,
(00:51:16):
if I've got a ton of makeup on, I'm like, you gotta be able to see all of this.
(00:51:20):
Cause some of my glasses block everything.
(00:51:22):
I'm so excited to join you on this path of just accumulating various glasses.
(00:51:28):
I feel like I was always like when I was like pretending to be a man,
(00:51:32):
I was like always like buying like black glasses or brown glasses.
(00:51:36):
But I don't want purple.
(00:51:37):
I want yellow.
(00:51:38):
I want pink.
(00:51:39):
I want, you know.
(00:51:40):
Oh, my God.
(00:51:42):
Get ready.
(00:51:42):
I'm going to start fucking spamming you because I literally had to ask my best friend the other day.
(00:51:50):
I was like, please tell me if this is a purchase I should make.
(00:51:54):
It was between a pair of glasses and something else.
(00:51:57):
And she was like, Taylor, that's three times more than the other thing you want to buy.
(00:52:01):
And you already have eight pairs of glasses.
(00:52:05):
I don't think that's enough.
(00:52:09):
I'm like, I have these red ones with cheetah.
(00:52:12):
I have pink and turquoise floral.
(00:52:15):
And then I have a pink and turquoise regular pair.
(00:52:19):
And then I have a black pair and a purple pair and a rainbow pair and a clear pair and the pink hearts.
(00:52:27):
I love turquoise.
(00:52:29):
I have a turquoise beady that I love.
(00:52:31):
I want to get turquoise glasses.
(00:52:33):
I want to like, I've got like some turquoise, like some shoes that have some turquoise.
(00:52:36):
Yeah.
(00:52:37):
Oh, you could totally.
(00:52:38):
Shoes.
(00:52:39):
Oh my God.
(00:52:40):
I like used to wonder how is it that a woman could own so many shoes, but now I get it.
(00:52:47):
I want more shoes now.
(00:52:49):
You know what I mean?
(00:52:50):
Like I don't have enough shoes.
(00:52:51):
I only have like four shoes.
(00:52:53):
Oh, you don't have enough.
(00:52:54):
You need much more.
(00:52:56):
I need more.
(00:52:59):
My favorite place to get shoes is Rack Room because like they have like high
(00:53:03):
quality shoes for super cheap.
(00:53:06):
I will check that out.
(00:53:07):
Yeah.
(00:53:08):
Rack Room.
(00:53:09):
Yeah.
(00:53:10):
It's Nordstrom's.
(00:53:11):
Oh, okay.
(00:53:13):
I think I know what you're talking about.
(00:53:15):
Yeah.
(00:53:16):
And the only reason why I started shopping there is because they gave my nonprofit a grant.
(00:53:20):
Oh, well.
(00:53:22):
And they actually have pretty good philanthropy programs.
(00:53:25):
So I was like, okay, you're not a horrible company.
(00:53:27):
Yeah.
(00:53:28):
So yeah, I'll buy some.
(00:53:31):
Yes.
(00:53:32):
Yes.
(00:53:32):
Okay.
(00:53:33):
We are about at the end of our time.
(00:53:35):
Is there anything else you wanted to share or want people to know or anything like
(00:53:40):
that or any other questions you wanted to talk about?
(00:53:44):
No, I really enjoyed this.
(00:53:46):
Anyone listening, please check out my blog, snowflakeangelbutterfly.substack.com.
(00:53:53):
And I'll make sure that's in there.
(00:53:55):
If you really want to understand me, just read my post about Phoebe Bridgers.
(00:53:59):
It's pinned to the top.
(00:54:01):
You should read all of their posts because all of them are great.
(00:54:06):
I really appreciate that.
(00:54:07):
I feel the same way about you.
(00:54:08):
I'm still not finished with all your posts.
(00:54:10):
There's a lot, so I apologize.
(00:54:14):
A lot of them, most of them are like, you know, quick reads.
(00:54:17):
That's good.
(00:54:18):
I try not to... I have a really short attention span, so...
(00:54:22):
I try to remember that when I'm writing, but every now and then you get a lengthy one.
(00:54:27):
And then they're like nine to 10 minutes.
(00:54:30):
It's like nowhere to be.
(00:54:32):
I always have to, anything I post is like half the length of what I originally wrote.
(00:54:36):
Cause when I'm just writing, I'm just like, whatever.
(00:54:38):
Just like 15 different impressions.
(00:54:45):
All right, guys.
(00:54:46):
Well, that is the end of today's episode of the Curiosity Chronicles.
(00:54:51):
Thank you so much, Andrew, for joining us today.
(00:54:54):
And please, please, please go check out Snowflake Angel Butterfly on Substack.
(00:54:58):
And I will make sure that it is in the notes.
(00:55:02):
All right.
(00:55:02):
Have a good day, guys.
(00:55:04):
Bye-bye.
(00:55:04):
Have a good day.
Queer Safe Spaces, Being Our Most Authentic Selves, and Boomer Americanism.